New Fridays
There are people who leave a life without leaving the city. The street remains. The house remains. The balcony keeps its shape. The curtain still falls in the same folds. The same bus still stops at the same stop. 𝗔…
AwareMess
Notes on the mess we humans create, love included
AwareMess
Notes on the mess we humans create, love included
elifgezici
Places to be
For months, something had been humming underneath my life. Very low. Very committed. I could be having a genuinely good day and it would still be there, doing its little shift in the basement. Coffee, work, running, dates, dinners, Amsterdam,…
I — Waiting
I have often thought that waiting is mistaken for time. It isn’t. Time keeps moving with the same indifference whether we are waiting or not. Waiting alters something else. It changes the weight of each minute. It persuades the body…
Misprinted
İnsan, dünyanın adil bir yer olduğunu sanmak için ne kadar genç olmak zorunda? Bunu gerçekten merak ediyorum. Bir yaş sınırı olmalı. Yirmi üç olabilir. Yirmi yedi de makul. Otuz beş yaşına gelip hala “İyi insanların başına iyi şeyler gelir.” diye…
Eşik
Bazı yolların sonu görünmez. Sadece sıcak olur. Öyle sıcak ki, ilk başta bunun yol olduğunu bile anlamazsın. Yürürsün. Sonra biraz daha yürürsün. Sonra tenin öğrenir. Taşın dilini, güneşin ağırlığını, yanmanın sesini. Kimse söylemez. Ayak tabanların bilir. Bazı yerlerden geçilmez.…
We’re Still Talking
Modern breakups rarely end. They just slowly downgrade into emotionally confusing subscriptions. Some breakups end in chaos. Blocked numbers. Public crying. One person moving somewhere else and suddenly becoming really into ceramics. But most modern breakups don’t actually end. They…
After the Flood
Lately I’ve been feeling grateful in embarrassingly domestic ways. Like standing in my kitchen at midnight eating strawberries over the sink while some melancholic woman sings in the background and realizing I no longer fantasize about disappearing every other Tuesday.…
The Men Who Need to Stay the Good Guy
At first, his emotional unavailability looked sophisticated. The no-social-media thing felt attractive. The privacy felt mature. The emotional distance looked disciplined instead of evasive. He worked constantly. Stayed busy constantly. Moved through life with the efficiency of someone determined never…
A Kind of Mercy
I was on the phone with my sister the other day, the one who used to scare me into crying when I was little by telling me I might die, and somehow seemed to enjoy it, even though she was…
girl, get up.
I’m on a train right now, on my way to celebrate my birthday with some of my favorite people. Which feels exactly like the kind of moment you’re supposed to be fully present for. And I am, mostly. But there’s…